Toilet Training

February 24, 2009

No, this is not a post about my toddler’s eco-unfriendly obsession with wasting gobs of toilet paper and constantly flushing the toilet.

Dear person who works in the same building as I do but calling you a co-worker would be an overstatement,

Why do you talk on your cell phone in a our employee restroom? I’m sorry, but if I have to flush during your stall conversation next door, so be it. Maybe twice… yes, flushing twice would be a better way to get the message across, perhaps. Or is three times the charm?

And what do you think the person on the other end of your call thinks of being allocated to your bathroom time? Not to mention that your conversation has left the TMI train station and is headed straight to crazy town. Do you believe that the can is somehow a safe haven for your shit in the shitter? Do you think that what happens in the ladies room stays in the ladies room or something? When will the memo trickle down to you that your public habit is pretty much fucking disgusting?

I would sign this letter, but you wouldn’t hear me over your mindless gabbing and the masonry inspired echo of your annoying voice.

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3 Responses to “Toilet Training”

  1. Sheila Says:

    I think company wide memo is in order. That is gross.


  2. I’d take it to our facilities manager, but rumor has it he doesn’t wash his hands, so it might fall on deaf ears.

  3. Britta Says:

    This is a huge pet peeve of mine too. Students are notorious for doing this.

    You may wash your hands on the way out, but I don’t see you scrubbing down that phone – and oh, look, now you just touched the door handle. THANKS!


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