Stickiest of the Icky

December 4, 2010

Checked out from the Sha Library…Curious George circa 1985.

On the grass? Barefoot? That’s no Camel.

Dear C. Brown, can I just pick one? My kid has a penchant for firearms and art museums have too many droopy boobs.

Shorty: Daddy, why do you need more wine?
Mommy: It’s called coping, Buddy, someday you’ll understand.


I’m Lovin’ It

September 29, 2009

Setting: Electricity is out because Weinergies can’t keep trees off their lines = we can’t get in the house (lesson learned about the lock on that fancy new door). Wet, tired and temporarily homeless, Mommy and Daddy take their precious small children to McDonald’s to kill time and eat a cheap, parental guilt-inducing dinner.

Shorty, age 2.5: :::whines loudly demanding new Hot Wheels Happy Meal car:::

Mommy & Daddy: “Hey, settle down” + “inside voice”

Shorty: (Serious face, pointing finger so as to reprimand Daddy) “THIS is McDonald’s. THIS is NOT a restaurant.”

Mommy & Daddy: :::peals of laughter:::

No Shorty, this is not the clown on Sunset.

Sepia abuse

July 1, 2008

What the Glacial Drumlin Trail looked like in 1890:

Jaykay, it was a GRAVEL trail back then… Gravel left behind by the glaciers and a caveman named Drumlin. And the Native Americans worked side by side with the early settlers to put up the transmission lines. True story.

When the pimp’s in the crib ma, drop it like it’s hot


June 9, 2008

Overheard on the Glacial Drumlin Trail

SeriousE cyclist wearing bright neon green:
“If Lance was around when Greg LeMond was around-”

SeriousE cyclist wearing bright neon yellow:
“Lance would have kicked his ass?”

When I say local, I mean local. The ‘Sha has a very cool little artsy gallery scene with occasional Art Crawls and the Friday Night Live events starting in June.

Oh, it’s no big, fancy Milwaukee Gallery Night with Dick Bacon exhibits, Beasties and Bronze Fonz haters. But it’s fun and refreshingly unpretentious. Those unfamiliar with the ‘Sha would be surprised to see the number of galleries right downtown within in a few tiny blocks.

I already spent some of our economic stimulus package on a painting by this chick and this dude.

Conscious Park? Aw hell, that’s just Frame Park, son.

No one said it would be easy to get there, but once you do, it’s worth the trip and the free boxed wine. But why the white zinfandel, why? WHY? At least, afterwards, you get to treat yourself to the best Gelato this side of the subcontinental divide.

What would a Sha post be without a shout out to The Steaming Cup?
here citzens of Waukesha stalk each other.

As light as it gets

March 21, 2008

edit: For those of you loadies who found this post by googling “MGD 64 alcohol content” I think it’s actually like 2.8% – Drink up, buttercups!

“MGD 64 is a sensible choice for consumers working hard to keep up with the pace of their life,” said Grant Leech, MGD marketing director. “Whether they are out with a group of friends or taking a break at the end of the day, MGD 64 provides all of the great beer aroma and flavor consumers want but with about 35 percent fewer calories than the typical light beer.”

Now those sound like the kind of people I want to identify with. If I drink this, I will get very young, very skinny, and uber cool. With an umlaut. I’m sure this quote was actually said by Grant, and not mined from lifestyle segmentation reports and injected into the press release by a booth babe.

Anyway, so it does taste decent, mostly because it doesn’t have a lot of flavor. You don’t want your light beer to try too hard with taste, because then you usually just end up with a skunky finish. I can see chugging these on a warm day and feeling pretty good about it.

Just keep in mind that the bathroom will be your BFF, because you’ll need to chug A LOT of these to get any good buzz going. I drank 4 of them last night. For those of you keeping track at home, that’s 256 calories. And I didn’t even feel my tongue so much as tingle. It turns out the alcohol content is a mere 3%. It’s so close to NA beer, that a recovering alcoholic or pregnant lady could drink this and feel no guilt.

But a dieter that wants to catch a buzz quickly over one beer might be just as well off with flavor and some punched up alcohol content, like a Lakefront Belgian White. Lakefront does a tasty job with beer. Especially when they do samples at Discount Liquor. Dude who runs that show is pimp. He wants you to try everything. Now that’s marketing.

I also see a March Madness drinking game here, somewhere: 64 Teams, 64 Calories, 64 Beers. Miller needs to put their stealth marketers on this one (i.e. the ones who don’t work on the “drink responsibly” campaign).